Thursday, August 25, 2005
the skies were grey. he sat outside the mall, crouched into some kind of a foetal position, and buried his head between his knees. "Why?", he kept asking himself. "Why must this always happen?". he stifled his emotions and fought hard against the reality. there he sat for hours and hours, oblivious to the world around him. he was all alone again. he had tried all he could in all he did to be a good companion, thoughtful listener, nice friend, active player. but he was still left alone. scenes of what had happened was all it took for another tear to roll down his cheeks. he knew that he shouldn't be cryin, because his tears were his only companion, only listener, only friend. nobody seemed to know that a stormy sea of emotions was whirling within him. a state of confusion, a feeling of being torn apart. he didn't want all that to happen....really, but would any kind soul hear him out? "it's been so long...give up...," his heart told him. but he didnt want to, no he didnt want to. he knew that everything meant more to him than anyone else. but it was not reciprocated, no it wasn't. "Face it, everyone's like that. you're not getting anywhere with self pity. no one cares. anymore." he was told again. he trembled in fear, at the thought of loss. yes, loss, his worst fear. he needed a shoulder to lean on and cry. but he was never able to cry before others. out they came of the mall, and everything suddenly blurred. no it wasn't the rain. he wiped that tear off his cheek on his sleeve, stood up, and forced a smile. somewhere in there, he was all alone again.it's useless. it's all useless. what's the point of trying so hard? it'll all be gone once the year 2006 starts. why why why why why can't life be nicer? i don't know myself anymore. sigh.
peed nwod, on eno yllaer srehtob.
benny. on 8:23 PM