Sunday, July 17, 2005
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I just watched this short movie on channel 8 acted by some local actors, Angel Heart, as sponsored by the Spastic Children Association School (SCAS), neighbour of MJC.

The story was about this couple who were florists and they gave birth to a daughter who had a heart defect at birth, and a son who was autistic due to lack of oxygen in the brain at birth. Storyline progressed, showing how they lived together as a happy family, and the older sister An-an, taking care of the autistic younger brother Cheng-cheng, who was psychologically behind other kids of his age.

There were chances that An-an's heart defect would recover on its own as she grew up, but it didnt. One day at school, some of her classmates made fun of her brother and in a fit of anger, she ran and chased them, wanting to stand up for her brother. She felt uncomfortable, as her heartbeat became highly irregular. A week or so later, she followed her father to the hospital to deliver a bouquet of flowers to a customer, where she caught a very high fever. At night, she started panting profusely, and the fever never subsided. She was admitted into A&E. Her heart dilation problem worsened. She required a heart transplant within 72 hours, or she could die of heart failure. But donors were rare... Her parents were devastated.

Cheng cheng, on the very same day her sister was admitted into the hospital, ran out of the house on his little tricycle, without the usual supervision from her sister. At the stairway, his tricycle rolled down the stairs. In a state of anxiety, he tripped over the first step, and rolled down the stairs as well. His head hit the ground; it was a very very bad hit. Cheng cheng went into a state of coma, as the blood clot was buried deep within his cerebral hemisphere, and an operation to remove it would mean a success rate of less than 10%.

The scene where the mother was between her two children on the ICU beds was very very depressing. She was crying SO badly, faced with a situation of having both children born with defects, and facing with the decision to give up Cheng cheng to use his heart for transplant onto An an.

That was what they did eventually, on the 2nd day, when An an's situation got very very bad and Cheng cheng's ECG registered a sudden low in the heart rate.

Of course, during the show there were many events that occured to strengthen the story line but it'll be too difficult to type them all here. Man, i almost cried watching that show. I put myself into the parents' shoes, and tried to imagine how i would have felt if i were the father or the mother at that very point in time. They blamed nobody except themselves for bringing the 2 children into this world, for inflicting such pain and unhappiness on them. They never regretted givin birth to them, but were afraid that the cheng and an would hold it against their parents.

One of the last few scenes was the couple preparing a little flower basket and laying the coffin with flowers, and a balloon full of Cheng cheng's pictures, preparing the death bed for their beloved son. The mother looked so tired and sad, crying silently to herself. It must have been really really painful, to prepare your child's death bed. Can you just IMAGINE that? i can't.. it's too difficult to.

From these, ive seen how precious children can be to their parents; how the parents live in much much more agony when children are injured or unwell; how painful and devastating it is when faced with a decision to give up one child to save the other; how much parents go all out to love their children. I kinda got THAT close to how our parents feel when we're injured or ill. It's really very very strong, i should say, but we seldom notice it because they don't show it. They need to be there to calm us down and tell us that it's alright, when they're probably 1 million times more anxious and worried than us. They'd definitely hope that the person injured or in bed are themselves instead of us.

Love our parents more, while we still can. And let's all be happier about life, cos we're mostly not born with serious birth defects, and we've got loving parents, and we've got a school to study in, and we own many things that perhaps many people in different unseen corners of even Singapore will never even get to own in their lives.

Love, such a wonderful thing. Be it parental love, family love, or mutual love between people, it always seems to be the best thing given to human beings. but it's also always the thing that creates misery and pain that're often unbearable.